Emotional stress and support.

I was so emotional the past two days about pretty much everything.

Suddenly I hated how I looked, not body wise at all (which is surprising to some since it's the major thing most women focus on when pregnant) but face and hair wise. Yes! 

I thought of how round my face is and how frizzy my hair is constantly regardless of what creams and hair products I used. I hated it.

Sigh

So my husband decided to send me on a day of zoning out to Porto Sokhna- Red Sea, with his dad since he's only here for a day for work. Instead of being all excited, I actually found myself crying my eyes out this morning before leaving the house. Why? No idea! 

Or maybe I know why but it's hidden under the mess of so many things.

I am nervous about my last month of pregnancy. Feelings of fear started to overcome me; it's not that worrying about being a mom or fear of not knowing how to take care of a baby, etc. because I know I've got a lot to learn and I am mentally prepared for it, my husband too of course.
However, it's the worrying about the constant nagging of people, and the numerous visits of people congratulating me... Just the hassle of social things of every occasion! Not that I don't want/like/ not appreciate them; it's just that from now I keep thinking of how much I want to absorb it all afterwards and pretty much involve none but my family and in laws..
I hate how in our culture people don't really let you be, everyone has to middle with everything.

I am not being rude or judgmental, I just find that every pregnant woman about to give birth should be supported by the closest people and not involve anyone until the overwhelming emotions of the delivery day are controlled.

The worst part I'm most emotional about is knowing that I am emotional about so many things that shouldn't matter to me at all. I am overthinking everything and assuming things that may not even happen! UGH !! 

I swear without the support of my husband, mom, and sisters I'd have gone into a depression phase. Elhamdullah..

And speaking of the support; I got back home in Cairo about half an hour ago to find a beautiful note from my husband.. I am blessed elhamdullah.

Till next time,
xx